Oh the places you will go and the people you will meet. Graduation 2021

 I love the way life gives us random opportunities to meet with people, connect with them, and learn a bit about their story. We live in a wonderfully diverse area, with a large population. This meant my sons graduating class was comprised of 1331 of his closest friends. With Covid, naturally this year has been different. Because of our large class sizes in our high schools, the only way our students could attend in person, was to have hybrid schedules that allowed two days a week in class. Mondays were asynchronous from home, logging in anytime before midnight, on your own time completing assignments. Tuesdays and Thursdays, he was synchronous, online from home on Zoom calls with teachers or logging in during specified times to complete work. Wednesdays and Fridays, he went physically to campus - both only with students whose last names started with M through Z. A-L went to campus Tuesdays and Thursdays. This made for a weird, and comparatively lonely year compared to what we all formerly knew to be normal. 

Graduation, however, isn't about watching your friends cross the stage. It's really not. It's all about you. It's your moment to not only congratulate yourself, but it's the symbolic ending to a life dedicated to being a student and transitioning into a world of different choices. It's become important to some, and it was not only important to our Senior, but important to me as well. As a parent, I so enjoy the moments my kids get to shine and celebrate their accomplishments.

Typically, because our graduating classes are so large, graduation events around us are usually held in Downtown Dallas at the convention center or at Southern Methodist University. In our district, we're also limited to the number of guests that can attend, which means our core family of 2 parents, 2 step parents, and 3 siblings to whichever child is being celebrated - rarely gets to attend everything. This year was no different, and we were allowed 6 tickets to graduation. Naturally, all 4 parents wanted a ticket, and we decided to give the other 2 to the grandparents who no longer live locally, but travel in their RV full time. We also had a party planned for our graduate, and were so excited to connect with our friends and family after the quiet year of Covid.

Graduation Saturday night, we were not feeling optimistic. Graduation was to be held at one of our districts football stadiums, which we all knew meant there was no backup plan for rain, and Mother Nature was promising a glorious show. We showed up anyway, the husband and myself, the grandparents, his dad and stepmom, and as we were literally about to enter the gate, the gate attendants announced graduation was being delayed and everyone needed to return to their cars for safety because inclement weather was coming in.  It was chaotic and confusing, but we all managed to relatively behave and at least hang out in the parking lot. Initially we were delayed only 45 minutes, but after 30 minutes, a thunderous lightning storm rolled in and we knew there was no way festivities were being held tonight.  We piled in the car with our dejected graduate and headed to a restaurant with the grandparents. The first place we choose had a limited menu due to failed equipment, so we decided to go across the parking lot to Buffalo Wild Wings. Unfortunately, we got caught in a rainstorm and our graduate ended up soaking wet and freezing in a cold, loud restaurant. After we had been seated about 15 minutes, we finally got the announcement from the school that graduation was being moved to the next day, with the time TBD. 

But, his graduation party was the next day and we were expecting 45 people. We left the restaurant in contemplative mode as we figured out how we were going to adjust. I secretly berated myself for not pre-packing for our Monday trip because now, Sunday, was going to be hectic. We decided we'd move our trip if needed, but we just could not reschedule the party because we couldn't expect our guests to reschedule. We were ecstatic when we learned graduation would be at 1 pm, and our party wasn't until 5 pm. Plenty of time. We went to sleep optimistic and looked forward to graduation the next day.

Sunday held clear skies, and plenty of sun and humidity. We were frustrated to learn that the concession were no longer going to be open, as they were the night before, but thankful for at least lukewarm water that we kept in our vehicles. Unfortunately, our graduates Dad and Stepmother weren't able to make it, but his sister was able to attend in their stead. We were very thankful to find seats high up in the stadium that provided a little shade in the 90 degree heat amongst the metal bleachers. 

As the graduates filed in, it was clear the delay had impacted a lot of students. 1331 students would have been attendance, but when all were seated, about 25% of the graduating class was not in attendance. The bleachers will filled with supportive family and friends and there was much happiness in the air. But it was HOT! 

Early on, my father saw one of the men next to us leave the bleachers, come back, and tell his wife they were out of water. My father quickly offered some of the excess we were carrying. At first, the man hesitated to accept it. My father insisted and that was all the opening two men needed to have an opportunity to chat. My daddy was a broadcast journalist in the Navy, and a small town boy who traveled a really big world - he can find anything in common with anyone and I'm grateful it's a skill he taught us as children as well. We moved a lot, so we learned to make fast friend.

My dads new friend was from India. He was so happy to be here to help celebrate (I do not know his relationship to the graduate) the graduate with his family, but his heart was sad and conflicted. Only two days before, his beloved cousin, who was living in Italy, took his own life as he had been a consistent victim of racism and bullying. I'm not sure what they talked about, but they ended up talking the whole time, and at the end, the gentleman made a point to tell the rest of us how kind he thought my dad was for the gift of a bottle of water and interesting conversation. He also thanked my husband, as he noticed earlier on that my husband had given our large umbrella to a family with two small children who were roasting in the heat, so they could have a little shade. 

We listened to the Class President, Valedictorian and Salutatorian and were so very excited when it was time for the graduates to cross the stage. One by one they went, one by one their families exclaimed. My daughter and I believe all kids should be supported all the time, so when silence would follow the announcement of a name, we made sure to clap loudly so they'd hopefully hear someone.  

Then it was Brooke's turn, and a single man, who sat right in front of us yelled loudy, "YEAH!!! GO BROOKE!!". We joined in clapping. When he was done, his normally pale face was red from yelling so loudly. He looked at us and said, "Sorry, I'm the only parent here", as an apology for his loudness. My daughter instantly went, "awww" and put her hand to her heart in sympathy as she thought the rest of Brooke's parents lacked supporting their graduate, at the same time, I was saying, "Well good job, Dad." to reassure him that his loudness was encouraged. He absorbed both of our responses, smiled warmly and explained, "No, no, no. I'm just the only parent here today. All 12 of us were here and ready for graduation last night, but, we all had tickets to Cabo this morning. It's actually Brooke's graduation gift. But when it was rescheduled last night, I just couldn't cancel all 12 tickets. So we decided to send everyone to Cabo, and Brooke and I stayed back so she could walk. So everyone is enjoying Brooke's gift on the beach, and we're going to fly out right after this."

As our graduate's name was announced, we hooted and hollered and made sure he could hear us. That moment, that moment right there, was the only moment we came to see, and we made it worth it. I stayed behind with the graduate for the last 15 minutes of the ceremony, as the rest of the family headed to our house to get ready for the party and our guests. Before I left, the gentleman from India and the gentleman with the two children who we had loaned our umbrella, thanked me again for my family as they shook my hand. Brooke's dad found an opening in the sea of people leaving the bleachers, and made an opening for me so I could leave as well.

I found my Senior in the crowd, beaming with pride and sweat in his black cap and gown, with tassel moved. There was so much happiness in his smile and I was grateful to the thunder gods for taking a rest so we could have this day. At home, we hustled and bustled, threw up last minute decorations and prepared food for our tribe. As our guests arrived, the heat and laughter increased and it was nothing short of an amazing time. Friends we hadn't seen in sometime came by, people who had nothing in common shared moments. There was food, cupcakes, toys, a piñata, guitar hero, Oculus Quest, beer pong, painting, music and lots of grill smoke and sweat.  But it was so much more than that. It was teenagers talking to 60 year olds and laughing with them. It was teenagers including another teenager because they didn't know anyone else there. It was people who may have never gone to the same public places, playing a song they both knew on guitar hero. It was nothing short of magical.

We all go through life so differently. For us, graduation was a time to celebrate and bring our tribes together in joy. Our Monday was simple with a trip to Missouri to visit a sick family member. For Brooke's family, a vacation in Cabo followed. For our new Indian friend, a funeral. For our guests, oh they have stories and journeys too. But for one night, for one moment, we got to share in each others stories and I feel so blessed for every opportunity we have to see the world from someone else's view.